The Lventure

 There have been moments in my life that have shaped who I am today, moments that changed the course, moments that define who I am. I picture these moments as both brilliant yellows so bold it could belong to the sun and others that are such a deep hue of black they are almost purple.  

But you want to know my favorite?

My favorite are the moments that are small, that build to the larger moments. The time in between the events that change my life. Silly little things to be quite honest, for instance, when I am fussing at Kevin and he forces me to hug him, I get so mad that I could pull my hair out, but in the hustle of me resisting I somehow every time laugh and give in to the love. 

 Or last Tuesday when I caught him watching me dance with Joslin as I waited for the pasta to boil. My hair was a mess, none of my clothes fit so I stole his shirt and in between “5month old” chuckles I saw him, pure love written all over his face.

I want to make every moment I am given count, really count. I have been given a love that is like a song so well written so honest pure & raw it brings tears to your eyes. I will always remember waking up in my apartment to post it notes covering the wall, list upon list of “I love you because..”

Writing is how I focus in on each of these, cherish them. Anyways I found this old letter I wrote to Kevin when he was overseas, I love remembering the absence because it makes to present that much sweeter. Here is a snippit.

….”as I watched you run to the distance to fight the war, I followed but was stopped by an imaginary line. I could not fight by your side, I could not be where I belong. Every day, like the faithful rising of the sun I would find myself at the line pacing. Checking for holes so that I may escape to your side.  Some days I stood strong looking in the distance dreaming of your blue eyes, others…I pounded and screamed needing to find you, like I need air. But the line stood strong & so did our love. Watchman of my heart when I found you I found the morning noises that feel the air, bringing crisp life to my damp ground. I found a love that was greater than life itself, one that I will always struggle to pin….”

The rest will just be something just Kevin & I treasure.

 Sigh.

 Basically I want you to make every moment count, so you can look in between the BIG and see the  beautiful delicate small.